I feel like the scarier part of that would be if you're off on the one of the wings. No.

Because I don't think your brain is fast enough to catch that you're not going to die.

So one thing I'll quickly say about that, the Yukon Striker, you'll never feel more secure on a ride than that one. Like, the harness that they have, it's like a full bodysuit. Uh-huh. Whereas the other ones like Leviathan and Behemoth, which are the other two big coasters there, you're sitting on this small seat that's completely exposed, and the only thing holding you in is like a plastic triangle that's that slaps into your waist. So you have nothing over your shoulders.

Oh, wow.

Nothing. That is actually like, the blue one, the Leviathan, when you get to the top and you come over and you drop, you feel yourself little

bit more than a ninety degree drop. Right? That's such

a That one's super intense.

And that

Ninety degree drop. That feeling is way scarier than the one you hang because you're just you you quit you can't even move where you wanted to on Yukon. So Anyways Oh

my god. Quite good. I remember as a kid having the dream after going to Wonderland that I was I I actually felt out of the roller coast. The what's the one where it has the it used to be the the wooden one, the biggest the really long one. Oh my god. Mindbuster? Is it the mind buster? Yeah.

It's still there, and it's still terrifying.

Yeah. You, like, lift out there's nothing holding you. Like, there's zero. You have a bar to hold on. You have to hold on to the bar.

So I went on that I I know we're way getting off topic. Well, I went on that, and there was this girl beside me. I'm like, have you ridden this before? She said, yeah. And I and she's younger, and I laughed. I said, are you scared? She's like, I'm terrified. And I'm like, you should have seen what we used to have because now they do. They have a seat belt

Oh, do they?

And cushions and individuals be and still with that, you feel like you're gonna die.

We did not. We did not. Terrifying

reckless mess of a ride.

Your ass would fly off of that seat. And, yeah, if you weren't holding on to it, pretty sure you could have left it.

Yeah. I'm amazed no one has ever died of

a ride.

Mhmm. Well

Wooden roller coasters are the best, though.

They're so

fun. PJ, are you a roller coaster fan? I'm not.

No. No. You're not a You guys are terrifying

me just no. No. No. No. No. No.

I don't do roller coasters at all. I don't do roller coasters. I don't do Ferris wheels.

I do not like the What about the swan ride?

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. That's my that's my my jam too, the swan ride.

Our daughter we were at, CNE, and they you were saying Ferris wheel. Gigantic Ferris wheel. I don't know what its size it is compared to other ones in this world. But, anyways, she was singing the song Great Ways to Die while we were in the Ferris wheel. And I was like, okay. You can maybe stop singing that. I'm like, stop.

The Ferris wheel and the roller coaster are not in the same category. I mean, it's big and you're high, but there's nothing really, like, dangerous or scary about it.

Yeah. The height the highest Yeah.

The height's enough for me. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

I was I was in Vegas a couple weeks ago, and they have that giant one.

Mhmm.

And I just looked up at it, and I was just stomach was just doing somersaults.

Hell no. Fuck no. Right?

Yeah. Yeah. Dude. Dude.

How's your week been, p PJ?

It it's been okay. It's, much like you guys. It's been a kinda sporadic week. You guys had Canadian day or Canada day. We had fourth of July.

I like that.

Mhmm. So it's, it started off, last week. I went I I as we alluded to earlier, I'm big, live music. I went and saw the band Goose, in my in one of our local, amphitheaters. And, like to say it was a great show, but I really don't remember.

So you had a good time.

I did.

Allegedly. I

did. They were what I remember was great, but,

They were serving goose, apparently.

Yeah. They they were doing I goosed. And, unfortunately, the next day happened to be my birthday, so I kinda suffered through that.

Oh, nice. Well, happy belated birthday.

Thank you. Thank you. And then I just kinda tried to coast through the rest of the week, try to avoid work as much as possible successfully. And,

It's good to have calls.

Absolutely. It's the beauty of being able to work from from anywhere. I can I can I can hit a find a brewery, sit down at it, and have my phone with me and just kinda answer emails and do what I need to do? Mhmm. And then we, got together with friends last week or last yesterday for, the fourth of July, pool party, and then the neighbors had a fireworks. So it was really nice.

Nice.

I appreciate you guys not having any spoiler alerts for, or spoilers for the bear. That's one of the ones that we're watching. I haven't started season three yet. I'm looking forward to it. I love season two was, as you said, Al, some of the best TV I've ever seen. Another show my girlfriend and I have been watching is, called Your Honor with Bryan Cranston.

Right.

Oh, okay.

Yeah. It's it's it's pretty it's pretty intense. It's pretty wild. Yeah. So it's two c two seasons that I know of right now. We're just started the second season. So it's, it's really interesting. So so that's pretty much about it.

Alright. Well, let's get started on tonight's festivities. Previously. Last week, we kicked off Shorzy three with our review and recap of episode one four to six. And, coincidentally, the only person not to give it a fresh rating was Tanya, who I would say is the four to sixiest of of us all currently. According to our scientific Twitter poll, yes, it is back. Eighty percent of you agreed it was a fresh wall. Twenty percent of you agreed with Tanya, that it was a clearance. No composts were given. This week, we recap and review episode two, Shorzi three, Charlottetown Reds with our buddy, PJ. Victor, are you ready?

It is.

Tanya, are you ready?

Good. Because I'm going.

Matt, are you ready?

Hell, yeah. Fuck yeah.

PJ, are you ready?

Damn straight, I am.

Good. You're fucking going. Yeah. That's good on the go, boys.

Alright. We open with the song Sunshine by Nazareth and a montage of the Bulldog's locker room as they get ready for a practice. Unlike other universals, universal montages, this one isn't in slow motion. It's the opposite. It's a time lapse. Beginning with Shorzi as the first player in the room taping his stick and the others trickling in and getting geared up, The time lapse stops, but the music continues with without dialogue as we push in slowly on Shorezy. You can see him relishing his time with the boys in the locker room. They make their way out of out on the ice in their practice jerseys, joking around and carrying on. Everyone's in a good mood, cuts after practice, and we're back in the time lapse as the players are all still carrying on while getting showered and changing back, to their street clothes. Shorzi is in no hurry. He just sits there chatting, still in his Under Armour and hockey shorts. Everyone else eventually gets dressed and leaves the locker room, leaving Shorzee sitting there alone. First one in, last one out. Cut to Shorzy, sitting in the arena stands by himself, and then cut again to Shorzy, this time standing alone outside the Sudbury Arena staring at the marquee. And we cut to the title card. That's, that's the first cold open of the season. Victor, what do you think of that?

That was good. I I I was surprised to hear some Nazareth.

Right? Yeah. Me too. I was like

I I I hope he paid royalties for that.

I'm not sure.

But yeah.

It's not one of their more well known songs, but I really like the tune.

It's it's still it's it's one of their probably bigger bands. Right?

Mhmm.

Yeah. That they've they've maybe even the biggest in terms of albums or or or listens or whatever they're they're tracking these days on Spotify.

Right.

Anyway, it was, it was really good. I I thought it was, a good way to start the episode, especially after, they set set the tone in the in the previous one. But, yeah, good start for sure. Mhmm.

Tam, what'd you think of that?

I love the feels on this one. Like, that was such it it just it took you into the to the dressing room, but not the, like, bitch fest, not the chirping at each other. It was just that those good kind of feels of the camaraderie and and the the the team and and how they are with each other, and it just was fantastic. I really liked it.

Yeah. I really enjoyed this scene. I mean, it's no secret what this season's about. Shorzy's aging out of the game. And I love how this showed his love for what well, the parts of the game he loves, and that's being with the boys in the locker room. You can like, the pushes in on his face while he's chatting, and everyone else around them, they're just taking for granted what's going on, but he's taking it all in. And the song selection was was great. Yeah. Matt, what'd you think?

I think this might be one of my favorite opens across the entire universe, like, both shows. I yeah. I really enjoyed it. It had the feels. Like Tanny said, it pulled you right in. The music was a fantastic choice. I loved his perspective on it and the technical creation of this all. I love the the the really slow pushes and pulls Mhmm. In and out of each scene. I would love to know how many takes that first one took because I don't know what the time lapse was, but it clearly was over whatever as he's prepping, and they're all entering.

Well, it

has to be long enough for people to come in, get dressed into hockey gear, and yeah.

Yeah. And the speed of the push on that, I don't know. But I I thought it was extremely well done and set the tone and the and the feel for this episode really well. So no. I'd I hands down, this was one of my favorite opening, and big big shout out to the crew on this one for pulling it off because, they they had me hook, line, and sinker on this one.

Yeah. The the only thing I was confused about later Mhmm. Because of this scene was that there there was a and we'll get to this, but there was a conversation about JJ not being away for a week or something like that. And then I'm thinking, wait. But he was there in that opening scene.

Well, he came back he got back just in time for the game.

But I I yeah. Sure. I guess I guess I just got But

he was at practice.

Oh, that's true. Yeah. He was at practice. Yeah.

Good call. That's a weird Mhmm.

It's I was that that ended up being just distracting for me. That's all.

There's another, incongruent, thing that I'll I'll get to a little later too. But, I mean, so far so far, so good with this cold open. PJ, what do you think?

I I Victor, that's a great point because I wrote it down too about the JJ Franke thing. It it seemed a little bit out of place. Like everybody's touched on, Nazareth, when I was growing up, you know, that hair of the dog album was best album cover I think I've ever seen in my life. Never a huge fan of their song. I loved, you know, their music, but I was never one of those, I don't know if it was metal or whatever you wanna call it, but really like that song. It was really nice. And, to see Shorzy sitting there, and he he just seemed to be not Shorzy. He was smiling. He wasn't being his little pain in the ass self. He just seemed to be really enjoying the moment as you said. I I thought it was a really nice opening. I liked it.

Tobias in the livestream says this needs to be in the discussion with true love in terms of the song selection. I don't disagree. I thought it was, I thought it was pretty well done. So cut to scene two, out of the cold open. The music stops abruptly. We hear Shorzy ask this question.

What's a fucking webinar?

Only one is a webinar. The other two are seminars.

We're in the national senior tournament. So? So we don't have time for a web

what? Webinar.

Do what you told you, dumb fuck.

Fuck you, Zee, you fucking hee haw.

Nat instructs Shorzy to look at the wall. There's a banner that reads for the community, by the community. They're going to use this national tournament to give back to Sudbury.

With a webisode? Webinar. The other two are seminars. Two? Yes. One webinar and two seminars.

For a

total of what, Shorzy? Count it out on your fingers, bud.

Count me out all this, you fucking goat face.

Uh-uh. As captain of the host at Brave Blueberry Bulldogs, you have to show face.

For what? For the community. By the community.

That's ambitious, Nat.

Hockey players give back, always have. They're good citizens. They make themselves available to help. They give their time like the hockey players before them gave their time. You a hockey player, Shosie?

When's the first salmon arm?

Seminar. Seriously, how does he not have his kiss all down the front end?

First game tonight, first seminar tomorrow. Let's be ready for Charlottetown reds.

As funny as that line is, Zeig is is really great in this scene. I love her her put downs to Shorzi. As Zig jokes that Shorzy is too hurt to play against Charlottetown, Nat says Shorzy always finds a way to contribute. Meig is already hearing chatter about how nice they are. Nat asks Sieg what the name of the Charlottetown main guy is. Cut to scene three. Cut to Shores again. Laura Moore sitting at Eddie's. Laura answers Matt's question.

Gord Gallant. Gorgeous Gord?

Tell me how you really feel. He's a good looking guy. Just another slut.

How

did you get to be such a straight tamale? Practice. Dedication, hard work. You're a straight ghost pepper. I'm interviewing him after this. Interviewing who? Gorgeous corn. Well, I hope you're ready.

For what?

Better get ready.

For what?

He's gonna take one look at you. He's gonna say,

oh my god.

He's gonna take one look at you.

He's gonna say, this place is great. I'm interviewing one standout player from each team you guys play. These fucking guys, we get to come to Sudbury and see the best thing we got. Big nickel? Laura, you are the best thing in Sudbury. You're drunk. You've seen me drunk.

Cut shots. Cut to shots of the sluts. Perfect season celebration. And then back to Shorzy and Laura, and she doesn't think that she get that drunk again. Shorzy says he's been hearing a lot of chatter about how nice Charlottetown guys are. Laura says, bets that, Gord is a donkey. Shorzy disagrees. He saw a picture of Gord on the tournament program, and he's earned his nickname.

I'd say bring him off and bucket. You're such an idiot. So you're gonna be thinking about him the next time you're just knocking my socks off? Yeah. Rocking my world. Think so? It'll be a whole gorgeous gourd the next time you're just making my universe literally melt around me. I'm all, like, floating and planets all, like, fucking All fucking, like, what? In orbit.

Laura informed Shorzy she'll be interviewing him too, so don't forget to pencil her in. She knows he's been stepping out on her with that other guy. This confuses Shorzy. Who's the other guy? Cut to the next scene and that other guy who's none other than Jory Jordan, host of the Sudbury Kids Sports Report. Jory announces the scores of the first few games of the tournament. The Sue Hunt narrowly defeat the Von Canadezi three two. The and Les Rapides de Rodin soundly beat the Brooks Berylman six one. However, the Brooks Freezer twins are herding guys, and we cut to a bunch of big crunching, hits by the Freezin brothers.

Starting off with the host bulldog's captain.

Oh, what's going on here? Jory then?

I'd say bring him off.

No. That's not it. Okay. I'm stuck here. Jory then throws to the next segment. Oh, no. Here we go.

He's Number

sixty nine. Sure. I've spent some time with this fellow recently and if given the opportunity again, I'd rather draw on my face with a box cutter. Would you look at him? That's a face only a mother should have smothered. Next, we have number four, Goodleaf, a man with all the charm of a clogged toilet. I've seen more charisma from stains on a dog bed. Number fourteen, Hitchcock, who is now offering to sit on your front porch on Halloween for a small feat. Number three, Jollofy Abbey, who looks like he enjoyed some of the Johnny Red eye that day. Number ten, JJ Frankie JJ, who I just know is walking around with a bad wife. And finally, number nineteen,

Bad Michaels.

We'll see the puck quite well for a guy whose eyes are so close together.

Troy goes on to introduce the Charlottetown team with the same gusto.

I've been hearing lots of chatter about how nice these guys are. Let's meet them, ladies and gentlemen. Here we've got starting goalie number thirty, Ewan McDonald. Who thinks this guy's ugly? You and me both. Up next, we got number sixteen, Murphy. See now, this fella's eyes are a bit too far apart, which is something that happens when mommy goes glug glug while fetus is still snug as a bug in a rug. That's right, kids. I'm talking about fetal alcohol syndrome. Moving on to number nine, Smith, the face of Prince of Rhode Island Dental Care. Number eleven, Kaden Campbell, because it wouldn't be a Canadian hockey team without a Kaden, Hayden, Connor, or Cole. Number twenty seven, Jackson Barnard. Look at the forehead on this man. Careful down time after dark, Jackie boy. Someone's gonna write Skoden on that thing. Finally, hockey player or Hallmark movie hunk? My god.

Rounding out the starting lineup of the Charlottetown reds is gorgeous Gord Gallant. Production note, Gord Gallant is played by former hockey and football player turned real estate investor, Nick LaPorte. Nick signed with two pro football teams in the US. One of them was the, Jacksonville Sharks of the Arena League and even attended CFL free free agent camp, but he didn't make the cut due to a torn calf and Visa issues. But, no, he's a real deal, folks. He's a athlete through and through. I even showed Tanya a picture of him earlier, and she it took her a while to count all the abs on the boy. It's

That's us.

But he's

not related to Gerard Gallant.

I I don't think so. No. Wow.

Who who does not have any app?